Coffee is also the bicycle for the soul. And other heartwarming stories found in the front of your local Borders.

He totally said that.

I think this is my masterpiece. It has coffee, bikes, computers, cats, and poop. I should stop now.

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We're using up the letter

Innovative, revolutionary paradigm-shifting, dicking around on the Internet.

I made this comic during the keynote yesterady (before they’d really announced anything new) and I’m amazed how true it is. For all things. Ever. So I posted it on Tumblr just to get it out fast yesterday. Sometimes I post things on my Tumblr, btw.

So tell me, Systemics.  Are you an Apple fan-person? Do you care about all the new stuff? Ever? Never?

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The System 502: The New Holidays

10,000th Tweet Day

Celebrated by: Reminiscing about tweets past. Singing songs like “Auld Slang Syne” and drinking. Silly hats are a must.

Traditional gifts: A new charger/battery for your Twitter-choosing device of choice. Cards should be no more than 140 characters. Sending photos of gifts and well-wishes via TwitPic and yFrog.

AIM Screen Name’s Bar / Bat Mitzvah

Celebrated by: Attending the event where your little boy screen name becomes a man (screen name). Witness as DrkwngDck1245 comes of age as he chats those on his buddy list with the chosen reading from the Torah, or more likely a link to a funny video that’s secretly a way to send your friend a picture of something they didn’t want to see.

Traditional gifts: Skype credits in multiples of 18, or a really nice Wacom pen.

Computer Warranty Expiration Day

Celebrated by: Wearing black, and looking back on the good times. The minute your warranty expires, your computer will start showing signs of age. The only real good news is the older your computer gets, the sooner you get to a new one.

Traditional gifts: A new computer.*

*Send money to systemcomic at gmail dot com.

What new holidays do you celebrate?

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The System 474: Just Stopped Working

Another week, more comics! Just a reminder, I’m heading off to SXSW at the end of this week to bum around, geek out, and party hard with all the other Film/Interactive/Comedy types. I’m going to put up a post about all this later today, but if you’ll be there, let me know! I’d love to meet up with some friends and Systemics.

Also, SUPER ART FIGHT IN DC! March 18th! I haven’t done a good job keeping up with the hype train, but if you’re in the area please help me make this a hit!

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The System 413.5: The New iTunes

UPDATE: mig25 just pointed out there was already a “413″ so I made this one “413.5″ since at this point many are based on this sequence already. If seeing a half-number is really throwing you, close your eyes, click next, and think of England.

I updated the Appearances and About pages. If you can make it to any of the upcoming conventions and other events in the next couple of weeks, let me know!

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It seems Apple has filed for a bike-related patent. From Kottke.org:

While we’re on the subject of bikes, according to a recently filed patent, Apple is looking at making a smart bike. I look to the future and I see 1) Consternation that Apple has signed an exclusive agreement to release the bike on Trek frames only for a period of 3, 4, or 5 years depending on which rumor you believe. 2) Several media stories crediting Apple for popularizing the riding of bikes. 3) Several media stories criticizing Apple for claiming they popularized the riding of bikes, even if they didn’t.make that claim, 4) Much rejoicing 3 weeks after release of the bike when someone has figure d out how to jail break the phone into a fixed gear. 5) 250 posts from John Gruber refudiating predictions of iBike failure. I look forward to all of it.

Here’s the post on Kottke. Here’s the story it links to.

G-ddammit why did I have to call it the iBike.

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The System 371: The Great Flash Debate

For those best represented by the last panel:

Apple doesn’t show anything made in Adobe Flash on the iPhone or iPad, and Steve Jobs released a statement all about it. Adobe has shot back with an ad campaign marked “We <3 Apple” linking to their take on Flash. Meanwhile every designer I know feels like their parents are fighting (after all, this site is brought to you by Adobe Illustrator on a MacBook Pro) and everyone else out there doesn’t give a crap and doesn’t fully understand why some sites aren’t loading on their shiny new iPhone.

What’s made in Flash?  What is it on the web that such users are missing out on?  I asked RossMom if she knew what Flash was one time, and she asked me “you mean on the camera?”  I explained that I meant on the computer, and she had no idea what I was talking about. Her and the millions of casual users out there like her just want things to work, they don’t care if it’s a crazy glitzy website for a movie or a video embedded on a website.  Reminds me of the whole Ikea changing their font thing.

I just get the theme from Flash Gordon stuck in my head any time someone mentions Flash.

UPDATE: If you’re viewing this post in Google Reader, there’s some issues seeing the comic. It’s on the site in the meantime, so you may have to just click through.  Or, here’s the image itself.

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The System 361: Sometimes Practically…

I almost had him ask about the battery life.

About the comic: Clearly this is a reference to the new iPhone that’s been “leaked” (via Gizmodo). It started with an idea about how annoying this sort of coverage has become, since it doesn’t help you get the phone any faster or do anything other than stir up crap, and leads to a nitpick content-hungry bullshit culture that does little for themselves or their readership.  I think they’re handling the whole thing in poor taste, they are choosing to openly and often use the name and photo of the poor engineer that lost the prototype iPhone 4G at a bar. I’m not linking directly to the story because of this (why send more traffic to something I don’t agree with?), but if you look on their site or Google it, it comes up straight away as of this posting.

Very mucho thanks to Jami “Angry Zen Master” Noguchi, who was my sounding board while I was writing this one. He first uttered the phrase about practically curing cancer, the rest was just cleanup.

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The System 331: Tablets 2

Both times I tried to export / save this file it crashed and I had to re-create it. Sorry for the quality, I had to screen shot while the file was shutting down and export through Photoshop. I think Steve Jobs is after me.

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The System 330: Tablets

For something that hasn’t even come out yet, people have a lot of opinions. Some even have caught glimpses. I personally am waiting until I see the thing. But why should a silly thing like that stop you? Seriously though, post your thoughts in the comments.

For that matter, the comic above is right on. It has been rated too much or “overrated”, accurate considering the review predate the announcement.

For those of you that don’t remember, my previous comics on Apple announcements are as true today as they were then. Updating Technology, the iPhone and The Stages of Grief.

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